Bra Shopping...

"These are my weapons of mass distraction. This is shock, this is awe." - Dolly Parton

Some say the cup is half empty, some say half full. Some girls, always have it full... I think sometimes it is good to get a size that fits you. There is no need to stuff into a bra that is too small. But I think i may understand now why it is that girls may wear bras that dont fit well. Do you have ANY idea how hard it is to find a nice bra that fits?
So a lady friend's mom calls me and tells me to go with her child (we'll just call her J. Monson...no that's too obvious...how about Jessica M.) and get her a new bra. A real bra. A nice bra. She recomended Vitoria's Secret. I discovered shortly thereafter that one secret is that there is no Victoria's Secret on this Island. But, i had a duty. A sacred quest. To seek the Holy Cup...well...Dual Cups. Do you know how difficult it can be pick out the perfect bra for a person with out being able to see the person in said bra? Not that I would want to. I am chase, clean, benevolent...well...I dont know what benevolent means, but I said I was when I was a boy scout. We first shopped at Sears. What was I thinking?! I already knew they wouldnt have the kind of bra I'd want. I think that is partly due to the fact that the only part of the paper I'd read on sunday was either the comics (untill Gary Larson quit) and the Sears Bra section. Hey, us mormon kids gotta have something...
Eventually we get tired of bickering about what bras I'd like her to have and what she would try on. A nice lady working there came up and started to help. I can't say I blame her for getting the impression that we were a couple. The employee kept pointing out bras and looking at me asking, "How about this one, you like her in this one?" The girl the bra was for might as well not have been there. All she did is complain. After I found one last nice looking bra that the girl would not try on the employee leans over and says, "Come on now...honor him!" Ah, I think when I get married, the first thing I will do is take her bra shopping. I was going to try that Arabian Horse thing where you tie them up in the desert without food for a day in the sun, let them loose and ring a bell for them to come back just as they reach the water...
We found one bra that was mediocre at best, when low and behold, we saw a Fredrick's of Hollywood!!! What a glorious place! Scratch those two other ideas, I'm taking my newly wed there first!
Anyway, we found some real nice, classy, and yes modist, bras. We took back the junk sears one and got 3 great bras, one of which was a water bra. It's like external implants. Fredrick is the man.
She was a sport through all this. I bet it is not easy to let a guy friend shop for your bra. She now has nice, attractive bras that, yes, no one will see, but will make her feel more pretty. Clothes will have that effect on people. It may not be on the outside, but reflects there. I also gained. I never knew how hard a good looking bra that actaully fits is hard to come by. I have quite an eye for bras now. I mean, i could already tell her bra size before, but now it's established that I do in fact know and have it memorized. She didn't even know it well. She fits better in her nice "D" bras than the "C"s...the cup runneth over no longer. And it is more than half full...

(P.S. If you read this, don't tell her I wrote this, she'll kill me... :-0 )