Dealing With Death...

"I have a testimony that divorce is worse than death."
- John Ngringertrang

In my life I've been to only 3 funerals. The first was when I was very young. It was the funeral of my Grandfather on my Father's side. I don't remember a thing about it. I only know I went to it because we have a long standing story in my family about how my mom lost me at the funeral home and I wandered into the morgue. When they found me I was crying and shaking a dead body because I couldn't get them to wake up.

My second was the death of a good friend of mine. We were both 16 at the time. He developed brain cancer and it took him quickly.

The third was on my mission. A widow with no family passed away in a Ward I was serving in. We attend to act as Poll Bearers since she had no family present.

So, as you can tell, I've had limited experience with death. That is why I have felt quite inadequate this last week.

I have been the first councilor in my Branch Presidency for about 18 months now. I am fortunate to serve with a great branch president. But, he has been off island for the last month and has therefore left much of the care of the branch in my hands. The second councilor is also great, but he is also off island for a month. The branch is essentially under my care. If any of you know me, you know how scary of a thought that is.

Last week I got an email notifying me that a member of our branch, John Ngringertrang, had passed away. The family would like the branch presidency to arrange an LDS funeral service and grave dedication. *Gulp* I am currently trying to figure out exactly what an LDS funeral service consists of before the funeral this Saturday.

Two days after the initial email I get another about the death of an infant in our branch. This death comes as a result of a difficult labor. Again, I am in the position to be of council. The most difficult thing I've done in this calling was to visit the family. I have never lost a very close family member and I don't have any children. Empathy is hard to produce without having been in a similar situation. I prayed that I could find some way to comfort and assist them as I drove to their house.

I visited with them, offered my condolences, offered assistance and support, and left with a prayer. It sounds easy reading it back, but it was emotionally very straining. I understand more now than ever before what it means to "morn with those that morn."

There is nothing like dealing with death to make you aware of your own mortality.