Nothing...

"Michael, I did nothing. I did absolutely nothing, and it was everything I thought it could be."

Ron Livingston as Peter Gibbons in "Office Space" (1999)

It has been a good long time since my last post. You might have noticed that it's even more sparse than usual. So, the questions begs: What have I been doing that has keep me so darn busy?

Nothing.

Honestly, I've been doing nothing, and it's been everything that I thought I could be. I was so busy with my two jobs, many classes and (believe it or not) taxing social life that I was ready to collapse. My one goal to accomplish this summer was this: Get bored!

In order to accomplish this, I had to watch TV, avoid productive time on the computer (i.e. blogging), and avoid work in any and all forms. As of yet, I am close, but have not quite been bored enough yet. It has been relaxing and I am enjoying it so far. As a bonus, this time has let me reflect some.

One thing that I have learned in my stint as a bump on the couch is that TV really does suck. My parents have a satellite dish. They get about 300 channels. I don't know how but I honestly find myself thinking, "There is NOTHING on." And I stand by it. My mom watches all 12 of the Home & Garden style channels. I don't get it. She will watch 3 or more hours a day of queer eyes telling misguided s and straight guys alike how to spend $1000 on cheap, tacky and ultimately uncomfortable furniture. I have asked her why she watches so many of these shows since they are all the same. She says she likes it because she gets ideas. Why in the world does she need all of these ideas if she never does any of the stuff? Here's and idea, see what else is on? Or better yet, what else could you do?

My dad on the other hand watches the 30 varieties of Discovery and History channels. You'd think that after watching 120 minutes of how magnets work and countless others on science and history that he'd say something intelligent or stimulating once in a while.

I have discovered the wonderful world of spin-offs. Joey is the miserable excrement of Friends. It's low rating were just high enough for the brass of network hierarchy to grant amnesty for one more season. Yea...

But even worse in my opinion are the shows with the same name and a short location or acronym appendage. You had CSI, then came CSI: Miami, CSI: New York, and my favorite CSI: Mesa. And there is Law and Order, Law and Order: SVU, Law and Order: SUV, and Law and Order: EIU (Elevator Inspector Unit). The big difference that I notice...is...well...OK, I haven't noticed one yet. But I'm sure if I keep myself strapped in my Clockwork Orange Recliner, pinning my eyes open, and force feeding my mind this refuse then I'll be able to see some form of uniqueness in some of them.

I don't think I even have to talk about the vile spew of "reality" TV. Five minutes of Brittney Spears new white trash pillow talk or some Fox-esc dating/island/survival/sex show and you already know it's too easy of a target for criticism. I was at my sister's house the final night of American Idol. I felt sorry for my niece. I watched her face as they were about to announce the ditz as the new winner. She held her hands up to her face and held her breath. It was as if some fraction of her life were to be so vitally changed by this. I don't think she blinked twice when she found out her cat was hit by a car. It's ironic that reality television makes us numb to the actual REAL things that DO happen around us.

So, am I really doing nothing? Well, not if you count watching TV. I've heard it said that you are what you eat. Others say, you are what you wear. In today’s age, you are what you watch. Given what's floating in our airwaves these days that can mean only one thing...nothing.